I have a friend who is blind and her name is the same as our next door neighbor. For the first few years after meeting the woman with the visual impairment, I called her Blind Denise to differentiate her from Neighbor Denise, when speaking of her to friends and family.
We assign nicknames to people in all sorts of ways, monikers the recipient will never know. I call myself the Blind Girl, sometimes writing stories about Blind Girl Problems. A man who we always see at the grocery store is a Pittsburgh Steelers fan. We don’t know his name so we a call him Steelers Fan; I am pretty sure he calls my husband Seahawks Guy. The reaming is not done with malicious intent but because it is easy and efficient, although unfortunately not always thoughtful or flattering.
Recently, calling my friend Blind Denise has rubbed me the wrong way and I have made a change. I now refer to her as Lawyer Denise, as that is her profession. She is also kind, funny, smart and brave. They all go good with “Denise,” much better than “Blind.”
I thought it might be difficult to get used to the new ID but it turns out it has been a quick adjustment . And that internal cringe I didn’t even identify until it was gone tells me I have done the right thing.
Don’t you just love when that happens?
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