In the past 11 years, I have not been able to see my own face in detail nor anyone else’s features. It’s a very peculiar way to go about life, for the obvious reasons and some not so apparent. A stranger smiles or nods at you in a store or on the street and you don’t know it, they think you’re rude. A store associate calls for you to come to the register while you’re waiting in line but you don’t know they’re signaling for you because eye contact cannot happen. I don’t always use a cane but even when I do these situations often occur.
While it’s true that my other senses have been heightened since my vision loss, something you may not realize is that being visually impaired can impact your hearing. If I’m out to eat with someone and it’s noisy, I can’t read their lips, a tool all of us use without even knowing it.
Looking in a mirror, I can’t pluck my eyebrows. Checking my teeth for debris after a meal is impossible. It’s difficult to put on makeup and once I do I need to ask someone if I did okay. Usually it’s poor Mister Rain. You haven’t explored all aspects of your relationship until you ask your partner, “Is my eye makeup goth?”
One afternoon my beauty consultant noticed my shadow on the wall. He told me not to move and took this photo. I looked at it on my iPad, enlarging it and holding the tablet close to my eyes. Of course we don’t often, if ever, view ourselves in profile but for someone who can’t see themselves, it was cause for pause.
Wow, there I am.
My first thought was of my mom always telling me I had a cute nose. She made my snout so her opinion is a bit biased. But it is kind of nice, the shadow nose. My next thought: I know you.
I would probably be shocked to see how I look today. 2024 Sister Rain has a lot more mileage on her than 2012 Sister Rain did. Big miles. We’re talking long road trips: death, illness, blindness. Sister Rain Shadow, though, she hasn’t changed a bit.
#sisterrain #alittlesightalotofheart #legallyblindwriter #blindnessisaspectrum #opticneuropathy #visuallyimpaired #blind #meandmyshadow