Since I stopped working, it has been very strange to not be accountable to anyone. There is no boss in my life, other than the one who thinks he is in the form of my husband, no figurative or literal time clock, no deadlines, no dress code, no annual performance review. Some days I have missed my old life so much I craved all of these things, odd as that may seem.
I have always been self-motivated, driven and ambitious and those qualities served me well in first my survival and then my healing. I took on the role of full-time stay-at-home mom to our rescue parrot, Piper, and set to work on projects around the house that I never had time for while at the office or traveling for business.
Now that I am preparing to start a new chapter in my professional life, the research, webinars, courses, (gasp) homework, making calls, following up and even blogging are entirely up to me. I answer to no one but me. Even for a Type A, more responsibility and focus is needed than ever before. If you have worked from home you know the distractions are infinite and even a load of wash or a toilet scrub brush can seem better options than sitting down and traveling your entrepreneurial journey.
I think the key is to throw myself into this new adventure with the same dogged determination with which I do just about everything; tasks that used to be easy, mundane, insignificant and daily. Washing dishes, applying makeup, cooking, writing by hand, laundry, walking outside: it’s all a challenge and takes much more time than it did when I was fully sighted. But I do them.
We all do things every day that are difficult and we don’t feel like doing. Some are major, some are minor, some frequent and some rare. Often these are duties we do for someone else. We have to find a way to do the same for ourselves, to make things happen, to move forward everyday on the projects and endeavors that are important to us. We can’t shy away because it’s out of our norm or because we aren’t used to working for ourselves, both in the org chart and the physical and mental effort kinds of way.
No, I don’t answer to anyone. But I owe myself a lot.
