Prior to my vision loss, I was able to do a lot of very cool things. I’ve gone hot air ballooning three times, once over Sedona and her beautiful red rocks, swam with stingray and a dolphin (not at the same time), helicoptered over the Grand Canyon, travelled to Europe and Africa, have been on four cruises, travelled all over our magnificent country. When I look back on these experiences, I am so extremely thankful and recognize how lucky I am. However, there is no sense of disbelief that they happened, even though they are all incredible things to show for the first 40+ years of a life.
Conversely, since I lost my sight, I can’t believe the things I have gone through and continue to have to do everyday to live my life. This week I learned I am eligible for Medicare. This is not a bad thing, at all, but at my age it made me think, once again: I can’t believe this is my life.
When struck by this thought, it’s not with a “woe is me” emotion but a sense of surprise every time. I know it’s my life, and yet . . . what the???
Does the incredulity come from not choosing for myself these things that have occurred? I did not conceive it and, therefore, I can’t conceive of it. Or in my case, is it as simple as seeing is believing?
