“You can hide from the world,
but the people who love you
will always find you.”
— Sister Rain
“The love changes us more than the loss.
It’s so very difficult to remember this
but so very important that we do.
It just may be the key to survival.”
— Sister Rain
We have all seen photos of people where there’s a black bar across their eyes to protect their identity. Our eyes show the world who we are. When I just saw one such picture, I had the thought that my eyes have a black bar of sorts across them from the inside and, therefore, others looking at me can get a sense of who I am, but I unable to do the same.
I’m told that I maintain good eye contact even though I can’t see your face unless you’re close enough to kiss. I follow your voice. The window to your soul, your eyes, may be closed to me by the “black bar” across mine, but your voice is the door to your spirit. I may be looking at your shoulder, but I see you.
What is it about a takeaway coffee cup?
Expensive and environmentally unfriendly.
The baby bottle of adults.
Holding one evokes thoughts of yoga pants, entrepreneurs and baristas who become friends.
So much better than your favorite mug at home.
“You’ve Got Mail”.
Paparazzi. As if anyone’s looking for me.
If ordering you is wrong, I don’t want to be right.
Find your latte in life. Whatever it is, it will be so much more than what it appears to be.
As you read this, where are your shoulders? I’m guessing up around your ears where most of us find them. I’ve noticed lately while sitting with Piper, our parrot, or watching TV that my shoulders are in the locked and upright position, or should I say uptight, position. I catch myself in these peaceful moments, wonder why and make myself untense.
I have commented during massages to the therapist, “Oh, that’s where my shoulders belong”, as they put them in the right place and strongly encouraged them to stay there. They don’t, of course.
Is it a habit? Why am I carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders ever, let alone in the least stressful times of my life? I’m Type A and driven, yes, but all the more reason to be successful at relaxing.
I hope that at 54 I can teach my shoulders a new trick. I encourage you to join me. Shrug all you want at the idea, at least then they’ll go down!
I started this blog in 2010 when I was searching for a job during the country’s financial crisis. Back then, it was drilled into us that “It’s who you know” that will land you your next position. Recently I have realized that this doesn’t only apply to finding employment, it pertains to just about everything in life. Sure, you can find anything you want with a few clicks, from doctors to handymen, but no matter how many Yelp reviews you read, there is no comparison between a Google search and a referral from someone you trust. I met my husband in 1990 through a friend and if you are a frequent visitor to this site you know how well that has gone, said in my usual cynical, sarcastic old-married-lady way with nothing but love on its underbelly.
Don’t get me wrong, I love Google, and, yes, I have even Googled myself. But when it comes to finding a job or someone to do a job, it’s still who you know, the original, often imitated, never equaled “network”.
Going out into our backyard to our trash cans around 9 p.m. one evening, it occurred to me that if I did not know the time I might have thought it was early morning before the sun came up. Any car noise was muted behind our house so that was not a clock clue. The air was fall-crisp, and from what I was able to make out with my vision such as it is, the sky was not fully dark. We were in that in between period, when the light would either increase or decrease depending on the earth’s rotation.
This kind of uncertainty can throw you off, leaving you feel panicked and scared. But there can also be a sense of comfort, knowing you’re just disoriented, nothing has changed but your perception of the situation. Once you can release the confusion, you can use your logic and experience to right yourself. Whether it was night or day, I was still in my backyard, a few feet away from the warmth and safety of my home. The only difference: Time for coffee or time for a Tylenol PM?
“I can lose that chapstick four times in one day, Tom.”