Sister Rain’s Note:
In 2015, I published 9.5 parts of “Piper & Me: A Love Story.” Beginning in March 2024 I reposted them weekly. I have since written new chapters and will continue to do so. If you would like to read any of the parts, type “Piper & Me” in the search bar.
Piper came home on August 26, 2012. On November 18th, I went to my local hospital’s ER because I had a rash on the back of my one thigh that I had no idea what it was. It was shingles. They prescribed an anti-viral medication, but the only real solution was to ride it out. Ten days later, I woke up on a Tuesday morning to find my right eye completely blind. I made an emergency visit to my eye doctor, who I saw for nearsightedness up to that point. He examined me, deeming my eyes perfectly healthy, but wanting me to see a neurologist, he made an appointment for me with one for the next day. This optometrist later told me that he suspected I had MS, as that often presents as vision loss in a single eye. I will never forget watching the finale of “Dancing With The Stars” that evening, with just one working eye.
The next morning, November 28, 2012, I woke up, opened my eyes and saw nothing. My second eye had gone dark overnight. I spent a week in a world-class hospital in Philadelphia, coming home completely blind seven days later. When people learn my story, they always comment that I must have been terrified. Honestly, I wasn’t. Since they didn’t find a reason for my absent sight, I assumed it would return. No cause, no effect, right?
The only thing I was afraid of, hand to God, was not being able to take care of Piper.
When I returned home, I refused to pick him up. He still would bite at will back then, I would not be able to see the signs both my husband and I had learned to identify before the pain of a small but mighty beak. I refused to let Mister Rain put Piper on my shoulder because I wouldn’t see the lunge before the clamp down. I stayed far away from him. I am sure it was confusing to Piper after three months of my unwavering attention and love.
In addition to me abandoning him, the constant influx of friends, family, nurses and therapists coming to help and visit me was very upsetting to Piper. He screamed when people were at our house, not calming down for an hour or so after they left.
Several weeks passed with me still avoiding Piper, despite us being home alone together most of the time. It broke my heart. I was aware of the fact that I was most likely undoing all the progress we had made in the last 90 days. But I didn’t see (yes, I heard it too) any other way.
Here’s the thing, though. Although I do not recall even one day when I did not want to get out of bed, Piper was the only purpose I had in those first months of my blindness. I had not yet figured out how to use an iPhone or iPad’s accessibility features, so I listened to the TV all day . . . and talked to Piper, even if from afar. I taught myself how to change his food and water after my husband had left for work. I still wasn’t handling him, but I was now with him all the time as opposed to having to go into my temp job while I looked for a new meeting planner position.
It turns out I had not abandoned Piper, it was just the opposite. I was present more than ever. I was not able to see him, but he most certainly saw me, all day, every day. I could not, WOULD not, let this little guy down. The future was unclear, yet the one thing I knew for sure was that a happy, well adjusted Piper was in it.
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