I heard the following today at the snack stand at Little League; a father was talking to his son: “Honestly, you’re on my last nerve. And that’ is not a place you want to be.” I wanted to buy him some peanuts and a big chill pill . . .
Salad And A Movie
My friend texted me that she had just come across a movie on TV with Derek Hough from Dancing With The Stars. We both watch Dancing, but I feel the need to report that we both watch sports, too. I replied to her that I had just flipped through the channels…
Auto In-correct
This morning I received this text from my friend: “Today Islam-day” I think we have all become good auto-correct decipherers, but this one had me completely perplexed. I replied, asking her what she meant. She came back with: “What I meant is today is HOMEWORK day!!!” I may have finally…
I May Knead To Explain
My friend and I went for massages at a spa neither of us had been to before. We were given a form to fill out, providing them with a very brief medical history. Because of my vision limitations, my spa sister was going to fill my form out for me….
Old Wife’s Hypothesis
My husband and I are opposites in every way. We don’t even hang our bath towels up the same way. I have never been diagnosed, but I do have some OCD tendencies. And although I don’t rehang his towel, every day I adjust it on the bar so it dries…
Cock-A-Doodle-Ding-A-Ling
The last two mornings I have been woken up by my bird (to be clear – not my husband’s bird) by bell ringing coming through the baby monitor. Yes, I said baby monitor. Our last bird was prone to night frights and . . . Crazy. Bird. People. Guilty as…
A Palooza Of The Parrot Kind
Said in my best Dorothy Gale voice, “We’re not in Dog and Cat World anymore!”. This weekend my husband and I attended Parrot Palooza 2015 at Bird Paradise in Burlington, New Jersey. It was our fourth year there and it didn’t disappoint. Vendors exhibited and offered food samples, toys were marked down and …
Consider The Source
Because I blame my vision loss for ruining my life (I was going to put LOL here but the fact is I’m not kidding), I tend to hold it responsible when anything goes wrong. Even if it’s not the cause. Recently my friend was picking me up after an appointment….
Nuts About My Bird
Yesterday, while he was eating an almond, Piper, my conure, became startled and flew onto my head. This happens from time to time, but yesterday he had held on to the almond while in flight and as he stuck the landing. Once perched atop my noggin, he returned to munching…